Life Update and a Milestone

A few years ago a dear friend from West Texas told me, “I’m busier than the best whore in the whore house on two for one night.” At the time, I just thought it was hilarious and not much else. These last few weeks I understand what that is like to the nth degree.

The week before Thanksgiving was spent gearing up to go out of town and Thanksgiving celebrations at the Preschool where I work. Thanksgiving week we were out of town. It was lovely and I had planned to cover that topic this week but instead, I spent this whole week just trying to get caught up from being out of town.
My house was dirty. I had 10,000 loads of laundry. We all immediately had to go back to work and school after being gone a whole week. My kids had the end of Football season games. And, I found out today my job is changing from three days a week to five days a week – every week – not just when they need a temp. My oldest turns 16 next week and I haven’t done a damn thing towards Christmas. I’ve not decorated. I’ve not bought anything. I’m seriously scrambling and behind the eight ball. And, if you know or have read this blog long enough, you know I don’t do anything halfway. There are no half assed jinglers here. We jingle all the damn way.

I said all that to say – a proper post is coming.

In other news, I have been doing this blog thing for three years now. I still only have about 50 subscribers which is slightly frustrating. Maybe all those friends that keep telling me I’m funny are full of shit or have bad taste. Just kidding, y’all. (Whispers – not really). I think I’m just not everyone’s coffee cup of vodka.

Also, it’s officially time to move from Metroburg as I saw someone at the grocery store today that recognized me slumming without makeup and wearing a mask. When you can live in a town and get recognized or when people know your business, it’s time to move.


Turkey Day

Tomorrow, the preschool I work for will have their Thanksgiving celebration.  We will be closed all next week so that most of the kids can sit at home and drive their parents crazy. Texas has not instituted massive lockdowns again. Although, I wouldn’t be surprised if they did. Toilet paper and paper towels are flying off the shelves. You’d think everybody expects the trots this Thanksgiving. At least one can still buy plenty of flour and such for your holiday baking.

I, for one, am going away for the holiday. I’ll let y’all know how it went when I get back. I hope I am not met by Texas rangers at the state line when I return asking where I’ve been and telling me to quarantine. I will do so. It’s no problem really, but it feels a little like the Gestapo.

This is one weird holiday for sure at least we still have Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade and Alice’s Restaurant. If you want to read a real Thanksgiving post check out my post from last year. It’s a peek into the white trash celebration of my youth. You can check it out here. Despite the shit show that is 2020, we still have many blessings to count. Be thankful.


Friday the 13th

Today is Friday the 13th and I’m not ashamed to admit I asked my hubs if he wanted me to throw some holy water on him before he walked out the door to go to work.

It was 8 months ago on Friday, March 13 that shit hit the fan. I can’t believe it’s been 8 months. To be honest, time has no meaning anymore.  What happened two months ago could just as easily be two weeks ago. But, humanity adapts. There is a new normal. Just the other day, I left work wearing my mask and was halfway home before I realized I was still wearing it. The preschool where I work has a rule that you must wear your mask while on school property – even in the parking lot while walking to and from the building. I’m so used to wearing it, I simply forgot to take it off.

I’m not so sure I like this new normal. While I can see how what we are doing to prevent spread is for the greater good (mask wearing, etc.), I see massive government overreach – like in California and New York. The long term ramifications of this pandemic will be studied for decades and perhaps centuries to come.

Besides the new normal, there’s also Covid fatigue. I’m pretty sure most of us are feeling that right about now. I know I am. I don’t know how safe it is but I’m doing everything I ever did pre-covid only I’m wearing my mask and washing my hands so much my skin is cracking. I walk the trails near my house. I go to work. I go to the grocery. I hit up TJ Maxx and Costco. I go out to eat. I see friends although we sit far apart. My mother in law visited last week. I didn’t hug her or get right up in her face but she stayed in my home. These are all acceptable risks or at least risks I’m willing to take.

What are you doing? What are you comfortable with? Are you still living in a bubble? I don’t blame anyone for doing what they feel comfortable doing as long as it doesn’t infringe on anyone else’s safety.



Keeping My Head Down

A funny thing has happened this week. No, not this shit show of an election. It seems almost everyone I know, myself included, has gone radio silent. The only things showing up on my social media feeds are friends selling essential oils and norwex cloths, Disney news and early black friday deals. My text messages are similar – kids requesting an after school pick up and the pharmacy telling me a prescription is ready.

I’m just as much to blame as everyone else. I have nothing to say. I was worried about the days leading up to the election. Certain parts of Texas are having Covid surges. I feared they would close in person voting. That wasn’t the case. Then I was worried about riots and looting after the election (no matter who won). And, now, this fresh load of crap we are dealing with. I mean who could have predicted all of this. Incredible.

All I can do is keep my head down. I get up, go to my job and avoid the news like the plague and don’t talk politics with anyone. I suppose I could pray. But, honestly, that’s about it. I hate to wish away time but damn if I don’t wish this dumpster fire of a year would be over already. Elon Musk needs to work on time travel or Jesus needs to hurry up and return.

P.S. My bright spots here lately is a new podcast I’ve been listening to called Unobscured and the return of This is Us. Oh yeah, and the podcast, this season is about Jack the Ripper. How is that for cheery?


Finish Line

I am so tired of this election season. Here in Texas, the politicians are just cut throat this year. I keep hearing phrases like “California values” and “take away your healthcare”. And, lets not even talk about the old fart shit show that is the Presidential race.  The only good thing I see about the whole thing is we have less than a week before it will all be over. Don’t worry, I’m not under any delusions that there won’t be some bru-ha-ha regardless who wins. I’m sure we’ll see protests, riots and whichever party that looses having a full blown hissy fit/come apart. But, the lionshare of mud slinging and shit shows will finally be over. At least that’s what I’m telling myself.

Regardless of where you stand, I hope you vote. I hope you educate yourself and not take what your candidate says at face value. If one party claims the other party is doing something or not doing something, do you your own research. I’m worried about a lot of the big oil rhetoric.  The big evil oil companies that everyone hates – they don’t just make the gas for your car.  Our modern life cannot function the way it does without petroleum. We absolutely need alternative solutions but need to a real workable plan on how to continue our lives without using petroleum – not some arbitrary date made up by a politician who has no idea how the world works. In case you didn’t know check out this infographic on how “Big Oil” touches almost every facet of our lives. Think about that when you go to the polls. 

Photo Credit: I have no idea. This has been floating around for a week now. I can say it’s 100% accurate. My hubs works for a company that supports big oil. It’s astounding how much of our daily life is possible because of petroleum and has been since roughly WWII. No copyright infringement intended. I’m not making any money off this thing. Don’t sue me. I’m broke. Blood, turnip and all that jazz.


Thursday Night Lights

Thursday night lights. No that isn’t a typo. If your kid plays JV, you play on Thursday night, not Friday night. I’m Bobby Boucher’s momma from the movie, The Waterboy. I hate football but every one of these boys playing and these girls cheering need to be here. That band that’s been practicing all summer in the heat while wearing masks, they need to be here too. These kids are all performers in one way or another and they need to perform. It’s in their DNA. They need that validation and recognition in their thing of choice.

Tonight, is the biggest game of the season. It’s a showdown of the two high schools in Metroburg. It’s a grudge match to end all grudge matches. I don’t want to be here but my kid is on this field. I hate sitting on a hard ass metal bench in temps that would rival the 7th level of hell or Siberia. I hate the overpriced nasty food. I hate the parents yelling at their kids from the stands knowing damn well those kids can’t hear that yelling. I hate the over zealous coaches trying to relive their glory days through these kids. I’m hating wearing this mask outside when I am already distanced like 12 feet from my nearest neighbor. A neighbor that is wearing a jersey with the last name “Stank” on it. How unfortunate is that?

Yet, here I sit because that’s my kid down there and it’s important. So, I’ll sit here in my mask, my eyes trained on my kid’s number and pray he doesn’t get creamed by some big kid on the other team.

Random, Uncategorized

Gnomes took it

Hey y’all, it’s been a crazy few days. No really, ever since I got back from my Cousin’s funeral it’s been non-stop. It’s been so crazy I forgot to take my child to a doctor’s appointment. I’ve never in my entire life forgotten to take myself or a kid to a doctor’s appointment. It’s been that kind of crazy. I have a proper blog in the works but in the meantime enjoy these pictures of these garden gnomes I found on one of my walks. I think the gnomes stole my brain and that’s why I forgot that doctor’s appointment. At least, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.


Country Mouse


My Mother married my Step Father (the man who helped raise me) a few months before my 7th birthday.  When he became my Dad, I inherited a Grandmother, an Aunt and Uncle and three cousins. This new family all lived in rural Kentucky. The town is a map dot. We’re talking a flashing yellow light and a couple of stop signs. Until the 1990s, addresses began Rural Route 3.  I became close to the youngest of these cousins. She was the only girl. Looking back on it, I basically played babysitter to her when we visited every couple of months until she was old enough to hang with the big kids. 

This cousin grew up mudding on four wheelers in hills they called hollers. She skipping school to help plant tobacco and ran the roads way to early with friends of her older brother who was closer to my age but too cool for us girls. She was the Country Mouse to my City Mouse. I could not truly comprehend her life and she couldn’t truly comprehend mine but we loved each other despite our differences.

My cousin was smart. One of the smartest ones in her graduating class. She skipped her graduation ceremony to run off with her boyfriend. They got married soon after and welcomed their first child. I begged her to go to college. I begged her to get out of that little podunk town where all there is to do is make babies and/or do meth. She stayed away from the meth but managed to have five babies.  She loved her children but her life was not easy. It was hard scrabble and yet she made sure her kids had everything they needed and most anything they wanted.

I got a call earlier this week saying my country mouse cousin had passed away. She had battled health problems for years – mostly uncontrolled type two diabetes and not taking care of herself. She didn’t make it to 40.  I remember when she was still in diapers. How can it be that she is gone?

I cannot wrap my head around a world without her in it. Even though I lost my mom at a young age, I cannot imagine how her youngest, who is 9 years old, feels right now.  I can never unhear her son wailing at the funeral, “I want my Momma and it’s not fair.”  

At some juncture during the funeral, I realized my connection to that family is no more. My Step Dad, my Grandmother, My Aunt and Uncle and now two of the three cousins have all passed away. I am not close with my remaining cousin so I will never go back to that tiny town. For old time’s sake, I drove by my grandmother’s old farm. All of the buildings have been torn down and I wouldn’t know the place were it not right next door to the family’s church. 

As I drove out of town, a late model SUV pulled out in front of me and proceeded to drive ridiculously slow.  On the back window was a sticker that read, “I hope you keep Jesus as close to you as you are to my bumper.” You’d never see a sticker like that in the city but you do in the country. In my hurry to leave that tiny town behind, I was reminded once again that this City Mouse doesn’t belong here. 

Photo Credit: Me – this is what the road to my Grandmother’s house. Rural Route 3 indeed. 


Podcast Recs – October 2020

It’s been a hot minute since I’ve done podcast recommendations.  If I’m being honest, I really wanted to write a blog about that shit show of a Presidential Debate or the fact that the Disney corporation just laid off 28,000 people but I can’t find the words for either topic.  Since there is nothing like some good old fashioned escapism, let’s get back to podcasts.

I’ve been listening to a lot of my old favorites like Disgracedland, History Chicks, Sean of the South and Mike Rowe’s The Way I Heard It.  If you have not checked these podcasts out, stop what you’re doing and do so. Seriously, so good on so many levels. 

Now for the new stuff.  One of my old favorites, Noble Blood, is produced by a company called Grim & Mild.  They produce a number of really good podcasts specifically centered around history with a twist.  With the case of Noble Blood, it’s all about royalty and their unhappy ever afters. That show runs about 20 – 30 minutes per episode.  Cabinet of Curiosities is much quicker usually around 10 or 15 minutes. It centers around the bizarre and strange.  Lore is another longer show running around 30 – 35 minutes. It deals with creatures, legends and places. While listening to these three shows, I’ve learned about all the wives of King Henry the Eighth, the origin of Lloyd’s of London, The Legend of the Wild Hunt and ghost ships. I find many of my family’s dinner conversations revolve around interesting tidbits I’ve learned from these podcasts.  Grim & Mild makes other shows that I have not listed here that may also interest you.  This is just a sampling of the stuff they put out. I’m not going to lie, I’d love to be a researcher for them.  Some of the topics they come up with – wow.  I’d like nothing more that to dive off into the deep end of research.  It makes my book nerd/useless information junky heart sing. 

Like with all my recommendations, I get my downloads from Apple Podcasts but these shows can be found pretty much wherever you get your podcasts. If you start listening to any of these, I’d love to hear about your favorites. Also, if you do podcasts and you have a recommendation for me, please leave me a comment. I usually listen while doing my walk/jogs and it really makes the miles fly by. 

Photo Credit: Kaboompics .com free on


What I’m Watching

black crt tv showing gray screen

Last Sunday night was the Emmy’s and I have to admit I have never watched the four shows that dominated – Schitt’s Creek, Watchmen, Succession and Ozark.  Don’t get me wrong, I’ve heard great things about Schitt’s Creek and Ozark but the premise does nothing for me.  Maybe if we have to go into lockdown again, I’ll watch it along with Breaking Bad. I don’t know. I find that I don’t dedicate myself to most series until I know it’s gonna be around for a few years.  

Having said that, I’m a sucker for documentaries and limited run series.  Here of late Netflix is owning it with those times of shows. I know many are “canceling” Netflix due to Cuties. Get over it. Child porn is everywhere and for as awful and inflammatory as Cuties is the documentary The Social Dilemma makes up for that awfulness.  Y’all, I always knew deep down that social media is the devil and yet I keep it around because I love keeping in touch with far flung family and friends.  We have been reluctant to let our kids have social media because we feel they are on their devices enough playing games and doing school work. After seeing that documentary I just want to burn all of devices and go analog again.  It’s disturbing. This documentary is definitely worth your time.

I’m also watching Challenger: The Final Flight. It has a time capsule feel to it and is very well done. Anyone over the age of about 40 remembers exactly where they were when it blew up that cold January day, I know I do. And, having always been interested in the space program, this show is just fascinating.

I also really enjoyed Down to Earth with Zac Effron. It’s a few months old and slightly contrived but to see how other places are working toward sustainable planet practices is interesting. Sometimes it seems to me that the world wants us American’s to do it but when you see what other countries are doing it brings it home that we all need to do what we can to help our people and our planet.  Some would say this show it a little propaganda-y.  Whatever. It’s still pretty good tv and Zac Effron is extremely easy on the eyes, at least that’s what my 13 year old daughter says.  I can’t say that she’s wrong.

Next time we’ll talk podcasts so all my podcast people I got some new favorites.

Photo Credit: Burak K on